What Works for you

What is the hardest thing to keep? I think it is a relationship. Keeping it going is not easy, it needs love, attention, tenderness and losta fertiliser. Not many people have the drive and energy to keep this going but it is something we all have to learn and do sooner or later.

Be it a friendship or a marriage, even a parent-child relationship, all require gardening! I am 36 years old and have seen all kinds of relationships, good and bad ones. I have tried my best to keep tending to it but it isn't always easy. Some are harder than others, especially the mother-daughter one.

The way we tend to our garden is very different from the person next to us. I have come to realise that, especially when we take advice from friends. Maybe pouring more water worked for you but it didn't for me. Which means we have to be careful about what we do and what advice we take. This is probably because all of us are made differently. Man. Woman. All of us are different.

I know sometimes my friends and family question things that I do in a relationship. I can explain all I want about why this is that and that is this but sometimes they just don't understand. All I can see is what works for you does not work for me. I wish sometimes that life was so easy as to all of us being the same but alas, we are not that lucky. Each individual is exactly that, an individual.

I also realised that I have matured much in my thinking and outlook in life. Just the other that I was telling a friend about why I do some of the things I do for a certain older couple and family. The explanation was simple, there is nothing wrong about being nice to them. I may not be absolutely crazy about them but they are there and say what you want, you have to live with them. Better to make the best of it and don't make them your enemies. I don't think I would have said that 10 years ago. Probably than I would have said %**&%*&(*!

But it is true, how you guide a relationship has a lot to do with the level of maturity. I know some people think the best way to find a solution in their relationship is to fight it out like cats and dogs. I think that way is such a waste of time and energy. But hey! If it works for you, go colour yourself happy lah.

I love my family and my friends. I hate to see sadness and I have come to the point where figthing it out is just not the way for me anymore.